In Gratitude

Without a doubt, 2013 is going to be remembered as Malaysia's annus horribilis. I have spent much of this year steeped in anger and frustration at the way our beautiful country is being destroyed by greed and incompetence. Yet, in a quiet moment after our family dinner,  when I thought about how I would describe this year that would soon be over, I was overwhelmed by a sense of gratitude for what I have.

I am grateful for my husband. Leo and I have known each other since 1978 and been together since 1987. That's a long time to be living out of each other's pockets. We've grown up together and are growing old together. It's not all sweetness and light but there is sweetness and he's my light. He's not perfect but neither am I, and there's no one else I'd rather spend this and every year with.

I am grateful for our children, who have grown up to become good and loving adults. It is very difficult to accept that one's children are ready to fly the nest and let go of their hands because I want to hold their hands and protect them forever. But ever so often, they'll reach out and hold my hand to help and protect me. And those are the sweetest moments in my life. 

I am grateful that my father and mother are still here with me. A tiny part of me will always be a little girl as long as I have my mama and papa.

I am grateful for my friends. There are friends I have known since school, friends I've made standing outside my children's school, friends of friends who have become my friends, friends who were once or still are my clients, friends with whom I've shared a cause. They are all wonderful because they fill my life with conversation, empathy and laughter.

I am grateful for my work. I could never be a tai-tai. But seriously, my work gives my days structure and purpose even though I'm flying by the seat of my pants most of the time trying to juggle deadlines. Not everything I do is great, sometimes it can be pretty trivial but once in a while, I write something that's just perfect and for a moment, all is right with the world.

So while I was thinking about everything I have to be grateful for, Leo starts watching a TedTalks video featuring David Steindl-Rast talking about gratefulness. Is the universe telling me that I'm on the right track? I know that I should spend 2014 thinking about what's going right as much as what's going wrong with the world. 

Happy New Year, my friends. 2014 will be full of challenges but may it also bring us peace in our hearts, joy and opportunities for gratefulness.